I always tell people that being a stay-at-home mom (SAHM) is the hardest job I have ever chosen. I’m blessed to have stayed home with my children for the last nine years and wouldn’t change it. However, I have had to figure out some habits that help me to still feel like myself while also accomplishing all the necessary homemaking tasks.
As a SAHM, I envisioned doing all kinds of fun activities while also being able to maintain a home my husband, children, and I could be proud of. I began to resent staying home at one point in this journey due to my inability to find a healthy balance. Knowing that I did not want to return to work, I began to develop some better habits in order to fully enjoy my dream of a SAHM life. I hope by sharing things that work for me I may be able to help someone else.
What I Do:
1. Keep a Wall Calendar for the Entire Family to See
Our wall calendar is color coded by family members and is helpful for me because I can see who has what and when in one glance (e.g., if I am looking for my oldest child’s schedule, I only need to look at the red entries and can ignore the others). It also helps that it is in a high traffic area of our home and readily available to everyone.
2. Develop a Cleaning Routine
I need a printed cleaning routine to stay on top of necessary housework. I previously wrote an post about my adult chore chart and it is still a daily thing I check off for myself. It’s constantly changing as we add and subtract different activities from our family’s daily life. The amount of chores per day depends on how much time I’m spending at home each day of the week and what nightly activities we have to attend.
3. Involvement in my Community/Church/Schools
Volunteering at the school my boys attend, subbing at my daughter’s Mother’s Day Out program, and attending a weekly Bible study at my church all give me time away from the house and let me enjoy the company of others. Community is something I’ve learned I desperately need for my mental health to stay balanced.
4. Working Out
In January of 2023, I joined a local gym, and it has been the best thing I’ve done for myself. I’m not only in good physical shape, but I am also in a healthier place emotionally and mentally. Taking an hour per day to work on myself has been huge in my personal journey over the last two years. I also love that I’m setting an example for my kids about the importance of caring for our physical bodies.
What I Want to be Doing:
1. Get Up Before Kids
This is something I’m working towards but haven’t yet accomplished. My goal is to get up 30 minutes before my kids to get dressed for the day, have a cup of coffee, and complete my Bible study. I believe a better attitude for myself in the morning would start our day off better all around. It’s rare this happens, but my goal is for it to be a habit by the end of the year.
2. Limit Screen Time
I’m not talking about screen time for my kids, but rather for myself. It’s so easy to open social media and lose track of time simply scrolling through posts and videos. I’m working on limiting my screen activity to smaller pockets of time. I’m replacing the majority of it with housekeeping, reading, etc. If I can’t stay off of my own screens, why do I expect my children to be able to stay off of theirs? I believe I need to set the example on the best ways to use my time each day.
Moving Forward
These are not all the things I’ve tried, but they are what I have found to be the most helpful for me. I also have these two routines I’m attempting to incorporate and will probably add more at some point in the future. I’d be interested to know what habits have been most helpful for other stay-at-home moms, so please let me know if you have any comments or suggestions!
