The Need for Connection
Being a mom is tough. Doing it while feeling isolated can be devastating. We all need mom friends. As humans, our brains are hardwired for connection. Studies show that our positive connection to others is the single greatest indicator of a happy and healthy life— far more than money, social class, IQ, or genetics. It can even prolong our lives!
I have always found the concept of Blue Zones fascinating. Blue Zones are areas of the world where people live the longest lives, consistently reaching age 100. Close community is one of the main threads these Blue Zones around the world have in common. Humans, especially moms, need each other to survive and thrive!
Where Are All of the Mom Friends Hiding?
I get it. Making friends as an adult in general can be difficult, and now you have all of the time consuming responsibilities that come with being a mom. Putting yourself out there and meeting new friends is possible, but they’re often found where you least expect them. Some of the places that I have met my closest mom friends are the following:
- Work
- Volunteering
- Daycare/School functions
- Libraries (story time is a great place to meet other moms while your kids play afterwards!)
- Playgrounds
- Community events
- Cooking class
- Book Club
- Church (small groups/Sunday school classes are a great way to get plugged in while in a smaller setting)
I haven’t personally done this, but have several friends who have found their best friends on local mom friendship apps, too!
The Kind of Friend I Want
Even if they haven’t turned into lifelong friendships, I have had some of the best conversations with other moms while waiting in line, getting my nails done, or shopping for groceries. A timely kind word from an older mom has offered me so much encouragement in the moment, and I always try to do the same when I see a new mom. If you see a mom struggling to breastfeed her newborn or a toddler laying on the ground throwing a tantrum, offering a smile and uplifting comment might make all the difference in her world.
We all have our story and truly never know what someone else is going through. Offering to be on call for a pregnant neighbor, or dropping off dinner after a mom in your kid’s class has surgery, could not only make her day, but also be the start to a meaningful friendship. I always hope I will be the kind of friend that I want someone else to be to me.
