Instagram Moms
We all follow them and admire their content and creativity. Some of us may even go as far as saving their posts so we can recreate their ideas later on. As much as I want to be that mom, I know that I am not, and it’s okay.
It really hit me on Saint Patrick’s Day when I realized all the other kids were wearing green while my son was wearing red. Just like it hit me when I dropped him off on Valentine’s Day wearing black. Not to mention Dr. Seuss week when I only managed to dress him up for crazy sock day. Let’s face it, there seems to be a national holiday for everything these days! I can’t promise that I will always dress him in the right colors or bake the perfect snacks for his school parties. That’s just not who I am.
What’s More Important Than Posting Memories?
For me, that’s an easy answer– making memories. My son and I will still have fun if our bunny shaped cookies come from a tube at the grocery store. We may even laugh more when they are done baking and they don’t even look like bunnies. Holiday parties at school are still going to be the highlight of his week even if he is wearing the wrong colors. I’ll bet the brownies I sent for his class will all be eaten even if they are Betty Crocker in a box.
For the longest time, I felt like I wasn’t an adequate mother because none of this stuff came naturally to me. I would compare myself to the moms I follow online, and I would feel like a failure. I would scroll through photos and see this other woman with three kids to my one. She is somehow able to keep a perfect home while making a red, white, and blue charcuterie board for flag day. Come on! Flag day?! I can’t even seem to put a pastel colored shirt on him for spring pictures, and you made an entire table spread for a holiday that lasts 12 hours!
Social Media is Not Always What it Seems
Recently, I was explaining this to a friend of mine. I was feeling a little down because I continued to compare myself to other moms. Then she asked me a simple question. “Do you think she let her kids bake those treats with her?” I honestly didn’t know, but I can sure tell you that if I allowed my two year old to bake with me, my kitchen would not be as pristine as hers. She then said that maybe this influencer doesn’t allow her kids to help, and they could be starving for attention while she’s busy gaining new followers and posting pictures of perfect pies.
Whether that is true or not, I felt like she was right. My house does not look pristine, and that’s because my son and I are making fun messes together. I don’t have time to bake the perfect cake at noon on a Monday because I work full time. When I’m home, it’s the quality time I spend with my family that matters to me more than how appealing my food looks. My social media is a hot mess. Sometimes I forget to post his pictures from holidays until a week later, but that’s only because we spent the holiday at home without our phones in our hands.
Not all Moms Are Created Equal
So, I’ve decided to delete some of the influencers from my apps. Maybe they do have it all together, or maybe they don’t. As for me, I no longer feel the need to compare myself to them. My son loves me and he is my entire world. He will never have to grow up and wonder where I was or feel like he missed out on the fun things in a child’s life. We may even look back and laugh at how many times I dressed him in the wrong outfit for photo-day! He will know that I tried my best everyday. I’ll never claim to be a perfect mom, and I’ll never pretend to be one on Instagram. But, my son will always have memories of us having fun together.
Don’t misunderstand me, if you are the Instagram mom who can make it all happen, then I praise you and I would love to buy a copy of your book! As for the rest of us who are barely getting by with life, much less flag day decorations, let’s always remember that we are not alone and that even us not so perfect moms are not loved any less by our littles.
